Thursday, May 26, 2012
“Girl! You did what?!!”
Jasmine’s
heart skips a beat as she reads Mindy’s text. Jasmine had texted Mindy six hours ago to
share her tour of Focus on the Family and her question to Dr. Dobson about the two lesser known curses to Eve and
closed, “Call me.” Mindy usually replies
quickly and with a phone call, if asked. Jasmine had hoped her best friend
would be proud of her, but these four words, with a question mark and three
exclamation points worry her. Mindy sounds
not proud, but shocked.
Jasmine was bold. Maybe too bold. Again, now at 32. At eleven, she was curious, cared about
people, and didn’t perceive herself as bold, and certainly not belligerent as a
few people sometimes said. Then she
learned to shut her mouth, and now she’s opening it again. Asking questions of authorities like Dobson
still didn’t feel bold to her, just natural.
Perhaps because she was the
forgotten middle child, Jasmine listened first to the wisdom within her and
second to anything from anyone else. She
hadn’t learned the concept of listening first to those seen as authorities. Nor did Jasmine realize that her inclination
wasn’t normal. Most people heed the
words of their authorities. Sometimes, when
her parents rebuked her for “thinking at odds,” they also mused that she must
have been listening to this person or that person, all of whom her parents
condemned, and none of whom Jasmine had ever heard of. On such occasions, she would gaze back
quizzically, wondering who these people were, wishing she could meet them, and hoping
they too might think at odds.
But, starting at the age of eleven,
Jasmine began to learn that most people accept the words of their authorities, even
when those words sound senseless and she began to learn the art of pretending:
pretend to agree with your authorities; pretend to “think at evens.” Eventually, pretending got tiresome. Couldn’t she simplify her life with
agreement?
Then she met Tim. Tim was an archer, and very skilled, not only
at the sport, but also at firing his arrow to into the bulls-eye of agreement
with authorities. If an authority says
leaves turn red in the summer, then they turn red in the summer. If an authority gives out a list of rules,
Tim follows those rules. Simple. How does he do that? By the time they met, Jasmine could no longer exert
the energy to respond to the rebukes she received for thinking at odds. If only she could marry a guy who’s good at
thinking at evens, then perhaps she too could acquire that skill. At the time, Tim seemed as though he was the
perfect groom.
Once Jasmine learned the concept that
authorities know best, and that the character in the Bible called “God” is the biggest
authority of them all, she found herself further perplexed: why would this big
authority command something bad, or forbid something good? And when this authority does, what should one
to do? Should one do anything about it,
or say anything? Jasmine, unable to
contain her sense that one should, muses that such a choice is like a test. As a teacher, Jasmine couldn’t help but to
the give the biblical characters a grade.
Noah seemed to have nothing to say
to God, and if he did, it might have gone something like this: “I understand, God. You wish to flood the planet and kill everyone,
but save my family and a pair of each animal species? What would you like me to do? Build a boat?
Yes, Sir.” Noah didn’t do the
killing, but to Jasmine’s way of thinking, he acted as an accomplice. Jasmine gives him a D. Joshua committed genocide. F. But
Abraham spoke eloquently and respectfully when God wanted to destroy two
cities, and he managed to bargain a deal out of God. A.
What about Eve? Her situation was different. Eve didn’t yet know what was “good” because
she hadn’t yet eaten of this knowledge.
But Jasmine notices the story says Eve saw that the tree was good and desirable for attaining wisdom, suggesting that she intuitively understood that
it would advance her consciousness – something good.
Why, Jasmine, marveled, would the
Creator forbid something good? Knowing
what is good to do and what is not good to do: shouldn’t that be something the
Creator should want? And why would this
Creator punish his creations for doing wrong before they learned to do
right? Wouldn’t they need to gain
“knowledge of good and evil” first?
Wishing to give the Creator in this
story the benefit of the doubt -- especially since he is called “God” --
Jasmine wondered whether “good and evil” meant dualism, a manner of thought
that can bring trouble and suffering.
But isn’t any advance of consciousness, whether or not it brings
suffering, better than no advance?
To Jasmine, Eve could not have failed
her test because she chose not to obey a command that would have kept her
stagnant in ignorance, but she also barely passed her test because she didn’t stand up to God. Unlike Abraham, she
didn’t say, “Hold on a moment, God.
Since knowledge is good, this command of yours is bad. Can we strike a deal?” Instead of facing God and asking for a better
deal, she went forth on her own. Better
than Noah, but not as good as Abraham.
She gets a “C.”
No matter how Jasmine reads the
story, Eve is hardly the villain she’s been made out to be. Not, however, by the eyes her church or its
entire tradition. From their point of view,
Eve failed her test. She disobeyed the biggest
authority of them all, and no matter how petty or cruel that authority’s
command may be, disobedience of an authority so great is the ultimate sin, and,
according to this tradition, Eve and all her daughters are to be rebuked.
Perhaps then it was better for
Jasmine that she was cast from her church.
At least now, she has the freedom to think on her own, no matter how
“odd.”
Can she explain any of this to
Mindy? Jasmine doesn’t know what she’d
do if her best friend thinks she went too far.
For the rest of the afternoon, Jasmine keeps checking her phone and
breathing, hoping her friend will understand.
At least it’s Mixed Doubles Night. Soon she should see her friend in person.
Glendale Racquet Club, 6:45 pm
Jasmine has
arrived to the warm-up room early, her heart pumping, still
concerned over her friend’s response to her question to Dr. Dobson. When Mindy walks through the door, with a
glowing smile on her face, Jasmine releases a great breath. Her chest loosens so deeply, she’s struck by
how tight it had been.
Mindy,
light-hearted in face and voice greets her. “Who are you?!” Mindy asks with a chuckle and
a tease and a clear love in her voice, “Sending messages to James Dobson?!” Mindy laughs again. Jasmine joins her in the laugh and admits she
couldn’t pass up the opportunity to find out what a true Christian patriarch
might say to her questions about the second two curses to Eve, “your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you.”
Still laughing,
Mindy says, “I don’t think most men rule over their wives, Jazzie. Actually, it seems a lot of wives rule over
their husbands!”
Jasmine
chuckles. “That’s probably true, Mindy. But have you read any of James Dobson’s
books?”
“Thankfully no,”
Mindy groans, with a roll in her eyes.
“Well, my friend,”
Jasmine pats Mindy on the shoulder, “you are blessed for that. His books were practically required reading
in my family, and he, admittedly with subtlety, seems to advocate husbands
ruling over their wives.”
“And he runs a
Christian organization,” Mindy laughs. “Jazzie,
you are crazy for doing this, but now you’ve hooked me. The suspense is killing me. What did he say?”
Jasmine
takes a deep breath and pulls out two small sheets, a photocopy of her inquiry
to Dr. Dobson for his opinion about the curse to Eve to desire her husband and the next one that “he will rule over you,” and a print-out of the reply she
received. Mindy reads Jasmine’s inquiry first, then she
turns to the reply from Focus on the Family:
“Dear Jasmine,
Thank you for joining one of our tours
this week and for taking the time to place your question. The doctor receives so many messages, he
can’t respond to them all, but we did bring your question to him. He said he can appreciate that this passage understandably
confuses you. Theological discussions
are outside of the mission of Focus on the Family, and for inquiries like
yours, we suggest you consult with the Billy Graham Foundation.
In
case this passage might be relevant to you personally, we have
many counselors who can offer you support free of charge. Please let us know if you would like to
consult with one of them about any personal relationship of you may have
yourself, and we will connect you with one.
Thank
you again.”
Mindy groans. “Can we say condescending?”
“I know,” Jasmine sighs.
“I wonder if he figured you were
putting him to the test, and he didn’t want to go there, so he decided to be
condescending?”
“Maybe,” Jasmine chuckles, catching
Mindy’s point that she had put ‘the doctor’ to the test. “But I hope I got him to at least think.”
“Or be ‘confused’?”
“Yes!” Jasmine laughs, “Or be
confused!”
Mindy joins Jasmine in a
laugh. She pauses. Mindy knows Jasmine has been ordered out of her church
and that this question is personal to her.
She gives her friend a sympathetic smile, slows down her speech, and
lowers her voice. “He’s not worth a
reply, Jazzie.”
“I know. I am tempted to reply, to share how I see it,
and even that patriarchal leaders like him need to repent of that ‘he will rule
over you’ curse!” Jasmine chuckles at
herself. Maybe this time, she is feeling
belligerent.
Mindy smiles with understanding. “I hear you. Let it go, and just let him be confused!”
